BOO Kitty!!!!

I really do not like cats. I think they make horrible pets because they poop and pee in a box. Oh you may be thinking but outside cats do not do that. Well letting a cat outside is inhumane...they can get hit by cars, are targets for mean people, and can be attacked by other cats! So I do have a heart and that is why we have Kitty.

8 years ago kitty was saved by my roommate and needed some work done. I took him to the vet and got him better. Thinking his owner would be looking for him I did not name him...I have now named him "You Stupid Piece of Sh*%." At first Kitty was fine, he got in our trash a few times but was pretty normal overall. Since he was an outside cat to start with we did not force him to give up his roaming ways. When we got a house we moved him too. He used to walk next to us for miles when we walked the dog. He knew everyone in our neighborhood...apparently to well. Kitty got cat herpes. When we moved to Stockton we decided Kitty was going to be an inside cat so he did not spread his disease. Also Kitty liked to walk in front of cars as they were moving and then lay down....in Stockton that is a death wish.

Recently Kitty decided that his litter box was uncool. He will poop there but the garage door is better for pee. It started when a repairman accidentally covered kitty's box and he could not reach it....now he prefers the door. For me this is a deal breaker. I am totally all for animals being treated with dignity and respect but Kitty is driving me crazy.

So on top of this Kitty has done some things that nearly pushed me to open the door and kick the little ba%$#rd out. The most recent was during Passover....I literally cooked for 2 days while breast feeding a 4 week old who was cluster feeding. That alone drained my patience. I decided to cook my meat dish in the Crockpot...this is what I woke to at 5 am....

For those of you who do not know, the torn bag is the Crockpot liner to make clean up faster...which did not happen.

I literally had to sit down and rationally talk myself out of killing the cat. If it was not that Leaf loves the damn thing Kitty would have been gone. Luckily he could not get the lid off so the meat was okay.

The worst part about kitty is I am his favorite person in the world. I never give him treats, I am always pushing him out of my way and he only purrs for me. So i am stuck with this cat...I volunteered t fund him a new home but Leaf said Kitty would miss the dogs.

So I am left telling Kitty to choke on a freakin hairball and die....Trust me no tears will be shed over that one by me. The worst part of the story is I have to be very careful that Kitty does not get out or die because of my doing because Leaf would think I did it on purpose. I am so stuck for a good 10 years with this cat!