For those of you who knew Gram and wanted to know what the plans are. My parents will not be back in the country until the 15th. We are going to have a memorial service on October 18, at 2 pm at the First Presbyterian Church in Livermore.
Next time Deanne is in town we are all going to take a trip up to Cache Creek and play let it ride....Gram's favorite game.
Tuesday, October 7, 2008
Monday, October 6, 2008
A Blessing
If death could be perfect I witnessed it tonight. Gram passed on about an hour and a half ago. In the past few days she was not communicating with us anymore and yesterday we got her into continuous care. Gram just drifted away. She slowly stopped breathing with me at her side. Since purple was Gram's favorite color I made the blog as purple as I could.
At first Gram would open her eyes when one of us talked to her but eventually that stopped. Hearing is the last sense that leaves a person so we all took turns talking and praying. There were a few moments that will stick with me forever. Darlene came to visit and for Darlene that was tough. When Gram heard her and felt Darlene hold her hand Gram moved and you could see she was happy. Everyday I visited Gram would ask about Darlene... The other moment was when Gram last had her eyes open. The people at Grams home called to me to come in because Gram opened her eyes. I brought Kasey and Elana in with me and I told Gram we were there. She saw us and smiled. It was precious.
In the end Gram was a fighter. The hospice nurse was surprised...she has never see a person live so long after the initial signs of death occurred. For 5 hours either John, Leaf, Elana, Kasey and I were there. We told stories about Gram, laughed at her feistiness, and made sure she was comfortable. In Grams very last moments I held her hand, stroked her hair and told her how much we loved her. At the moment she took her last breath I kissed her and gave her a hug...even the nurse was crying. I left the house knowing my life will never be the same. Gram was such a big part of all our lives.
I am sad that I can no longer call her and tell her stories about what we are doing. No matter how exciting or boring Gram would listen intently to every detail. She was so proud of each of us and loved us more than anything. This morning when I was with her she kept saying "I love you" over and over again. She knew it was her time and the last thing on her mind was her family.
I know now that Gram is finally where she wanted to be for so long. She always told us one day she will be up in heaven with Pop. I am sure he was waiting with open arms and probably a special dinner he cooked up.
I am so blessed to have had the opportunity to be with Gram practically everyday in the last few months. I loved hearing stories and talking with her. I know that she was not always aware of what was going on and she often was frustrated but I felt that the time I spent with her was what she would have wanted. She was a great lady and I can't wait to tell Elana all about her one day.
At first Gram would open her eyes when one of us talked to her but eventually that stopped. Hearing is the last sense that leaves a person so we all took turns talking and praying. There were a few moments that will stick with me forever. Darlene came to visit and for Darlene that was tough. When Gram heard her and felt Darlene hold her hand Gram moved and you could see she was happy. Everyday I visited Gram would ask about Darlene... The other moment was when Gram last had her eyes open. The people at Grams home called to me to come in because Gram opened her eyes. I brought Kasey and Elana in with me and I told Gram we were there. She saw us and smiled. It was precious.
In the end Gram was a fighter. The hospice nurse was surprised...she has never see a person live so long after the initial signs of death occurred. For 5 hours either John, Leaf, Elana, Kasey and I were there. We told stories about Gram, laughed at her feistiness, and made sure she was comfortable. In Grams very last moments I held her hand, stroked her hair and told her how much we loved her. At the moment she took her last breath I kissed her and gave her a hug...even the nurse was crying. I left the house knowing my life will never be the same. Gram was such a big part of all our lives.
I am sad that I can no longer call her and tell her stories about what we are doing. No matter how exciting or boring Gram would listen intently to every detail. She was so proud of each of us and loved us more than anything. This morning when I was with her she kept saying "I love you" over and over again. She knew it was her time and the last thing on her mind was her family.
I know now that Gram is finally where she wanted to be for so long. She always told us one day she will be up in heaven with Pop. I am sure he was waiting with open arms and probably a special dinner he cooked up.
I am so blessed to have had the opportunity to be with Gram practically everyday in the last few months. I loved hearing stories and talking with her. I know that she was not always aware of what was going on and she often was frustrated but I felt that the time I spent with her was what she would have wanted. She was a great lady and I can't wait to tell Elana all about her one day.
Saturday, October 4, 2008
It has been a while
It is 610 am as I am writing this. Elana decided it was time to get up and play earlier BUT I think she is going back to sleep so while I am waiting I figured I would try to update this.
Things have been crazy! My parents are out of town so I have nobody to go visit...at least who is fun...during the day. They have been gone for a week and a half and still have 2 weeks to go.
The biggest news is I hate pets...They are messy, they wake the baby, they are demanding, they dig/scratch, AND I will NEVER get another one. I told Leaf to enjoy the ones he has because this is it.
Oh, by the way I am typing this with one hand and a squirming baby...I guess we are getting up. On Elana news, she so close to crawling. She spins, she scoots back but nothing where her hands and feet are working together. She is also now saying dada....WTF.I knew it would happen but when Leaf opened the car door and she said dada I will admit I was jealous....he got a tear. She has also said hi to the baby in the mirror....all of this is indiscriminate I know but I have used it to my advantage. When she calls out dada from the crib early in the morning I roll over and say "Leaf she is calling you." It helps with the pain of her sucking me dry and not saying my name yet.
On the Gram front...she is pretty peaceful now. Generally she is happy. Not a huge fan of being awake but I guess she is making up for the years she could not sleep. Since my parents have been gone I have taken over all the Gram stuff...not a big deal since she sleeps so much and does not complain
so that is all I can remember...I need to take some more time to keep this updated.
Things have been crazy! My parents are out of town so I have nobody to go visit...at least who is fun...during the day. They have been gone for a week and a half and still have 2 weeks to go.
The biggest news is I hate pets...They are messy, they wake the baby, they are demanding, they dig/scratch, AND I will NEVER get another one. I told Leaf to enjoy the ones he has because this is it.
Oh, by the way I am typing this with one hand and a squirming baby...I guess we are getting up. On Elana news, she so close to crawling. She spins, she scoots back but nothing where her hands and feet are working together. She is also now saying dada....WTF.I knew it would happen but when Leaf opened the car door and she said dada I will admit I was jealous....he got a tear. She has also said hi to the baby in the mirror....all of this is indiscriminate I know but I have used it to my advantage. When she calls out dada from the crib early in the morning I roll over and say "Leaf she is calling you." It helps with the pain of her sucking me dry and not saying my name yet.
On the Gram front...she is pretty peaceful now. Generally she is happy. Not a huge fan of being awake but I guess she is making up for the years she could not sleep. Since my parents have been gone I have taken over all the Gram stuff...not a big deal since she sleeps so much and does not complain
so that is all I can remember...I need to take some more time to keep this updated.
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